Friday, July 22, 2011

Joke of the day

So today I was having a super crappy morning at work.

Then, I met with a group of Vice Presidents and Managing Directors to discuss the financial results for the end of the 2nd quarter. Many of them were talking about future projects, profits in the second half of the year and even merging with another financial services firm to expand our office. It was interesting since my boss brought in a corporate finance attorney who worked for a lot of dot.coms in the Silicon Valley back in the late 90's.  His name was Andy* the Attorney, and he was a very enthusiastic guy. He was jumping up and down the halls with his presentation kits, smiling and I am sure he could have used some decaf coffee. He has served in house counsel for many large corporation and successful entrepreneurial ventures. Andy had been working in corporate America for a very long time.

He gave our project team a big lecture on the benefits of merging with XYZ company, and how if we buy them out, then our product diversification mix will grow substantially. We will have more clients, industries and function groups to work with our clients. He was so enthusiastic, our entire staff gave him a standing ovation after his lecture.

After his lecture, I had a lunch meeting with him and 3 guys in my department.

He used to work for one of the biggest coffee house chains in the world. I will give you a hint, the company starts with the letter "S" and is based out of the west coast. This company does NOT franchise its coffee houses anymore, but for a brief time back in the mid 90's, they used to offer some franchises.

He started telling me about the franchise process and how he would get investors to join this GIGANTIC coffee house chain. During lunch, he stood up and started running around our table in circles, moving so fast and telling me about the marketing, products, start up money and so on. He then said "To buy a coffee house franchise with (guess the company name?) back in 1995 , you needed to have  5 million dollars in liquid assets. Then you need to qualify with good credit, and then there is the training.."

Suddenly I started laughing in the middle of lunch. My boss looked at me like I was crazy. The other co workers looked at me like I was out of my mind. Andy the Attorney wouldn't stop talking about this coffee house. Andy started to get bothered by me laughing, and then I looked up at him.

 I said, "Andy, If I had 5 million dollars in liquid assets, I sure as hell wouldn't be buying a coffee shop. I don't know what the hell you are smoking, but if I had 5 million dollars in cash I would be in Hawaii. I'm Sorry. That is wrong, but that is funny!"

Then my boss started laughing.

Ok so it really wasn't that funny of a joke of the day, but it made my day a little better! I guess it was one of those "you had to be there" moments and you weren't there. Oh well, have a great weekend everyone!

- The Poor Paralegal

*name has been changed to protect privacy

Saturday, July 16, 2011

Enrollment Drops Drastically at Law School

Good News....

It looks like more and more law school administrators, faculty and staff are now accepting the facts about the legal profession. There are so many unemployed lawyers and not enough jobs. I do applaud Vermont Law School for addressing this issue by lowering their class size by nearly 25%! You read about the article here:  Law School Enrollment down 23.8 %

The article discusses how the school is coming ot terms with the fact that we simply have too many attorneys chasing too few jobs in the United States. One of the staff members at VLS even said, "With the recession and tough legal job market there are more lawyers and fewer legal jobs”

VLS is known for having one of the best environmental law programs in the country, and it is a very well respected school. I have a lot of respect for the administration of this school for actually coming to terms with the changing legal job market. I wonder what made them decide to lower enrollment? Was it all these scamblogs? I will never know, but I just hope more schools follow and start lowering enrollments.

If you are a law school faculty member or administrator, please keep reading these blogs. Listen to the sad stories you hear about graduates drowning in debt, with no job prospects and working dead end jobs. Don't dismiss us as whiners, actually take the time to listen to what we have to say. It reminds me of a scene I once saw on Ally McBeal on youtube. You can watch the video on Youtube yourself.

- The Poor Paralegal